Where no man has gone
Still not convinced that William Shatner is your lord and savior? Let's compare his activities to yours in recent months to get a read on how your accomplishments stack up to Shatner's, side by side: - You: Despaired about the news
- Shatner: Penned inspirational, capital-case blog entry titled This Was A Really Troubled Year For the World, More So Than Ever
- You: Watched a DVD
- Shatner: Established DVD club that "provides you with a selection of rare and compelling Sci-Fi, Fantasy & Horror films, personally selected by William Shatner"
- You: Emptied your bladder
- Shatner: Sold kidney stone to virtual casino
- You: Sang along to car radio
- Shatner: Co-produced surreal, music-themed celebration of self called Living in TV Land: William Shatner in Concert
- You: Watched Discovery Channel
- Shatner: Headlined two hour Discovery Channel documentary unassumingly titled How William Shatner Changed the World
posted by Strikethru at
8:35 PM
4 Comments:
Nicely done. You gotta love the Shat-man.
Did You Read The Comments On His Blog? They Must Have Some First-Cap-O-Matic, Because All Of The Comments Echo His Stylistic Oddity.
Maybe He's Trying To Convey His Odd ... Pausing Emphatic Speech ... Pattern In Online Form.
There are a number of things I can't stand about Shatner, and I would just love to share them with you. As this post will make clear, if Shatner is going to talk about higher standards, then he needs to live by those higher standards.
Shatner is doing everything in his power to make me self-censor my critique. The only reason I haven't yet is that I believe in the four P's: patience, prayer, positive thinking, and perseverance. Don't give Shatner's stances a credibility they don't deserve.
Before you know it, Shatner's poison will infect us, sicken us, and destroy us. That's the theory, at least. But in practice, when Shatner hears anyone say that it would be impossible, even between the covers of a thousand volumes, to list and describe all of the truculent things that it has done, its answer is to abridge our basic civil liberties. That's similar to taking a few drunken swings at a beehive: it just makes me want even more to protect our peace, privacy, and safety.
My goal for this letter was to carry out this matter to the full extent of the law. Know that I have done my best while trying always to deal with Shatner appropriately. Let an honest history judge.
Although anonymous's Shatner critique was generated by an automatic complaint generator, it is strangely, spot-on. Such is the way of Shatner.
As To The Comments On Shatner's Blog, I Attribute His First Cap O Matic To Not Only Suggest His Syntactic Stylings But To Represent The Relative Weight Of Each Of His Words Compared To Those Of Mere Mortals.
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