Lipstick
If you're not a crazy plant person, just move along now, there is nothing here to see. Ok, who's left? Hello?
Anyway I have had this damned lipstick plant since the Ford administration more or less, well, for a couple of years anyway, and it has never produced any g0d *&^%ed lipsticks no matter how much I mixed up the the holy trinity of plant care factors, light, water, and that green stuff in the dropper bottle. And let me point out that there were once years where houseplants became strangely important to me, to the point where I needed a machete to access my office at work. During those verdant times, the lipstick plant stubbornly refused to reward me with any of its namesake blossoms, and in fact often sulked with dropped leaves and an overall dull, dispirited appearance.
This season I have ignored it completely. Perhaps it got some ambient moisture from a spilled Coke can, I can't be sure. It has definitely baked at random times depending on the position of the windowshade, pulled up and down without any concern for its high-maintenance "indirect light" needs. And the contents of the dropper bottle have certainly calcified this season from dis-use. And how am I repaid?
In lipsticks.
posted by Strikethru at
12:00 PM
4 Comments:
You can put lipstick on a plant, but you can't make a pig drink water... or, you know the expression. That is a weird looking plant. How come you didn't show it to me when I was over on Friday?
Don't be silly, that plant has been sitting on the side table in my house for three years. For the record, my goldfish plant has also sprouted goldfishes.
My wife and I have one of those plants. I've always taken a half-assed approach to taking care of it...but it took about a year for it to get up the gumption to sprout lipsticks. Ours are purple, though.
I could have sworn it had one lipstick on it when I was there last. Am I dreamin'
Might be allergic to cats.
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