iPod 2: Russian Roulette
It's tempting fate to do this again, I know. It's bad enough that the overall mass of songs on the damned iPod is hardly keeping up with the latest musical trends, unlike the song list of a certain iPhone-toting indie rock kingpin of a friend that I know. But adding to that, iPod is usually hell-bent on mining the lamest, least-listened-to songs in a list of thousands upon thousands, and serving them up on every single walk or commute. Sometimes twice. What are the odds of hearing the same song twice in twenty minutes, on a 20 GB iPod? Math people, figure it out.
I am going to list songs until I get to a really embarrassing one, either that, or I get bored.
Let the games begin.
Uncomplicated
Elvis Costello and the Attractions
I am not sure why this is on here. I never could quite warm up to Elvis Costello.
Oh, Yoko!
John Lennon
This is one of those great romantic songs that you want to make about you, but how can you, with John Lennon saying "Yoko" every five seconds? Somehow, they worked this into Rushmore and it went over OK.
Ice Water
Cat Power
Cat Power is atonal and inscrutable. I am not sure if I like her or not, except for those handful of songs that really knock you on your ass. This isn't one of them.
Nice Dream
Radiohead
I guess "The Bends" was sort of Radiohead's Rubber Soul, their big announcement that they were breaking out of the heavily populated ranks of alterna-guitar dude rock and ascending into Terribly Important Band That Eventually Devolves Into Electronic Bleeps and Blips territory. It still contains references to trite rock tropes like human emotions, which is how you know it is pre-blip.
Cinco De Mayo
Liz Phair
Ugh. She went out of her way to make me hate her, what with the Barbie corvette slut pop record about getting it on with teen dudes while playing Xbox consoles, recorded when she was a 30-something divorced mom.
Things I Will Keep
Guided By Voices
My friend Scott, a metalhead, declared them The Best Band Ever, and people? It's true.
Take it Easy (Love Nothing)
Bright Eyes
He seems to inspire spitting hatred in a lot of dudes. Is it his flopsided hair? His sallow, pale complexion? His lemur eyes? His affected, Joe Cockeresque stage manner? His absurdly prolific output of music? Tell us, dudes. Tell us.
We Do What We're Told
Peter Gabriel
You see, I do not listen to Peter Gabriel. I just want to make that clear. In fact, when we first got The Super Lame High Def Channel insisted upon by Tech Nerd Husband, a PG concert was being broadcast (end to end, for weeks and weeks, as they tend to do on HDTV) and the husband kept it on the TV one night, slowly turning up the volume, just to see if I would yell at him. In this concert, all of PG's stage minions wore Gregorian-chant style robes, and shaved their heads, as not to upstage PG's bald pate with their own unseemly manes. PG himself wandered around raptly with his robe and earpeice microphone while this great glowing orb slowly descended from the ceiling via a bunch of pulleys. I think at some point, PG actually climbed into the orb. I think it was supposed to be a symbol for his ego.
Badlands
Bruce Springsteen
Bruuuuce! Whooooo!!!!!!!
Tilted
Bob Mould
Bob Mould is one of those marital imports, those musicians that just come with the territory of being in a relationship with a certain, Bob Mould-loving person.
Mining for Gold
Cowboy Junkies
I had a deeply obsessive relationship with this record when I was a senior in high school. I still routinely sing this particular track, an a capella song about dying in a coal mine or lung diseases or something, I'm still not sure, when I am driving home from day care, and the baby starts crying.
Avenue
Salim Nourallah
Zzzzz oh what? Did I fall asleep? Indie rock elevator music.
Innocent World
Joseph Arthur
I am a pretty big Joseph Arthur fan, having dragged my non-show-going ass out to see him perform within the last decade, but am sort of in a phase of not listening to him for about the last year. Hmm, this is a boring anecdote. He is dreamboaty in person and wears wacky scarves.
Love is Hell
Ryan Adams
Ryan Adams is another one of those dudes who just barfs out albums, didn't anyone learn anything from Prince? No one likes you if you give them too much. You've got to hold back. It's a sad fact of human psychology. Great song, by the way.
Dry
PJ Harvey
Bleah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I can't stand the sound of this record. It reminds me of my very most awful and hideous senior year of college. Ugh times 10,000. Pardon me while I zap this off my iPod with a fridge magnet.
We May Be The Ones
Paul Westerberg
My iPod is in love with Paul Westerberg, which doesn't bother me because he rules. My only issue is that he cranks the recording level on his recordings so that if you're listening on shuffle, you'll suddenly burst an eardrum.
Boring Enormous
Paul Westerberg
I am in no way kidding. This was the next track.
Is It Really So Strange?
The Smiths
I recognized the greatness of this band even back when I was a deeply tasteless young person barely out of junior high school, and for that I am proud.
Formed a Band
Art Brut
"Formed a band! We formed a band! Look at us! We formed a band!" Wait, a minute, why am I singing along?? Art Brut is one of those annoying pseudo-Clash DJ darling bands that I constantly complain about. Why is this song on my iPod?
Bird on the Wire
Leonard Cohen
I went through this weird mopey Leonard Cohen phase awhile back. The song of his that I find the most heartrending is actually the supposed Janis Joplin song, Chelsea Hotel No.2, in which she says to him, "we are ugly but we have the music."
Omaha
Damien Jurado
He's this gloomy folk dude with a reedy high voice who actually looks like this normal sort of chubby guy you probably know from somewhere. If a machine had to come up with music I would immediately and uncritically like, based on algorithms of my complaining, current tastes, and emotional issues, it would likely spit out Damien Jurado.
Hey Hey, My My
Neil Young
I actually can't think of anything to say about Neil Young. He doesn't need my opinion, exactly, does he?
Endless Supply
Pernice Brothers
They are kind of too intellectual bubble gum machine but occasionally step on the rock accelerator.
I Am Trying to Break Your Heart
Wilco
Wilco is currently in their devolving bleeps and bloops phase, but back in the Yankee Hotel Foxtrot era were at the top of their very long and convoluted game. This album is very extremely great, if you happen to possess my personal opinion.
Gloria
Laura Branigan
Well, with that...
I am going to list songs until I get to a really embarrassing one, either that, or I get bored.
Let the games begin.
Uncomplicated
Elvis Costello and the Attractions
I am not sure why this is on here. I never could quite warm up to Elvis Costello.
Oh, Yoko!
John Lennon
This is one of those great romantic songs that you want to make about you, but how can you, with John Lennon saying "Yoko" every five seconds? Somehow, they worked this into Rushmore and it went over OK.
Ice Water
Cat Power
Cat Power is atonal and inscrutable. I am not sure if I like her or not, except for those handful of songs that really knock you on your ass. This isn't one of them.
Nice Dream
Radiohead
I guess "The Bends" was sort of Radiohead's Rubber Soul, their big announcement that they were breaking out of the heavily populated ranks of alterna-guitar dude rock and ascending into Terribly Important Band That Eventually Devolves Into Electronic Bleeps and Blips territory. It still contains references to trite rock tropes like human emotions, which is how you know it is pre-blip.
Cinco De Mayo
Liz Phair
Ugh. She went out of her way to make me hate her, what with the Barbie corvette slut pop record about getting it on with teen dudes while playing Xbox consoles, recorded when she was a 30-something divorced mom.
Things I Will Keep
Guided By Voices
My friend Scott, a metalhead, declared them The Best Band Ever, and people? It's true.
Take it Easy (Love Nothing)
Bright Eyes
He seems to inspire spitting hatred in a lot of dudes. Is it his flopsided hair? His sallow, pale complexion? His lemur eyes? His affected, Joe Cockeresque stage manner? His absurdly prolific output of music? Tell us, dudes. Tell us.
We Do What We're Told
Peter Gabriel
You see, I do not listen to Peter Gabriel. I just want to make that clear. In fact, when we first got The Super Lame High Def Channel insisted upon by Tech Nerd Husband, a PG concert was being broadcast (end to end, for weeks and weeks, as they tend to do on HDTV) and the husband kept it on the TV one night, slowly turning up the volume, just to see if I would yell at him. In this concert, all of PG's stage minions wore Gregorian-chant style robes, and shaved their heads, as not to upstage PG's bald pate with their own unseemly manes. PG himself wandered around raptly with his robe and earpeice microphone while this great glowing orb slowly descended from the ceiling via a bunch of pulleys. I think at some point, PG actually climbed into the orb. I think it was supposed to be a symbol for his ego.
Badlands
Bruce Springsteen
Bruuuuce! Whooooo!!!!!!!
Tilted
Bob Mould
Bob Mould is one of those marital imports, those musicians that just come with the territory of being in a relationship with a certain, Bob Mould-loving person.
Mining for Gold
Cowboy Junkies
I had a deeply obsessive relationship with this record when I was a senior in high school. I still routinely sing this particular track, an a capella song about dying in a coal mine or lung diseases or something, I'm still not sure, when I am driving home from day care, and the baby starts crying.
Avenue
Salim Nourallah
Zzzzz oh what? Did I fall asleep? Indie rock elevator music.
Innocent World
Joseph Arthur
I am a pretty big Joseph Arthur fan, having dragged my non-show-going ass out to see him perform within the last decade, but am sort of in a phase of not listening to him for about the last year. Hmm, this is a boring anecdote. He is dreamboaty in person and wears wacky scarves.
Love is Hell
Ryan Adams
Ryan Adams is another one of those dudes who just barfs out albums, didn't anyone learn anything from Prince? No one likes you if you give them too much. You've got to hold back. It's a sad fact of human psychology. Great song, by the way.
Dry
PJ Harvey
Bleah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I can't stand the sound of this record. It reminds me of my very most awful and hideous senior year of college. Ugh times 10,000. Pardon me while I zap this off my iPod with a fridge magnet.
We May Be The Ones
Paul Westerberg
My iPod is in love with Paul Westerberg, which doesn't bother me because he rules. My only issue is that he cranks the recording level on his recordings so that if you're listening on shuffle, you'll suddenly burst an eardrum.
Boring Enormous
Paul Westerberg
I am in no way kidding. This was the next track.
Is It Really So Strange?
The Smiths
I recognized the greatness of this band even back when I was a deeply tasteless young person barely out of junior high school, and for that I am proud.
Formed a Band
Art Brut
"Formed a band! We formed a band! Look at us! We formed a band!" Wait, a minute, why am I singing along?? Art Brut is one of those annoying pseudo-Clash DJ darling bands that I constantly complain about. Why is this song on my iPod?
Bird on the Wire
Leonard Cohen
I went through this weird mopey Leonard Cohen phase awhile back. The song of his that I find the most heartrending is actually the supposed Janis Joplin song, Chelsea Hotel No.2, in which she says to him, "we are ugly but we have the music."
Omaha
Damien Jurado
He's this gloomy folk dude with a reedy high voice who actually looks like this normal sort of chubby guy you probably know from somewhere. If a machine had to come up with music I would immediately and uncritically like, based on algorithms of my complaining, current tastes, and emotional issues, it would likely spit out Damien Jurado.
Hey Hey, My My
Neil Young
I actually can't think of anything to say about Neil Young. He doesn't need my opinion, exactly, does he?
Endless Supply
Pernice Brothers
They are kind of too intellectual bubble gum machine but occasionally step on the rock accelerator.
I Am Trying to Break Your Heart
Wilco
Wilco is currently in their devolving bleeps and bloops phase, but back in the Yankee Hotel Foxtrot era were at the top of their very long and convoluted game. This album is very extremely great, if you happen to possess my personal opinion.
Gloria
Laura Branigan
Well, with that...
posted by Strikethru at
9:52 PM
6 Comments:
Hey, why are you stopping? It's just now getting to the good stuff!
Where's the A-ha, that's what I want to know.
Posted by user: Tiny_dogfan425
I feel I must point out a fact for the less eagle-eyed readers out there. As you know, tiny-dog, in addition to her solo site, also has a "super group" side project called uberhoot.net. And in one of her early posts for that site, she had a post entitled "Indie rawk bands I hate for vague reasons". In that article she lists Art Brut as one of the bands she hates. Yet here on tiny-dog, it just happens to appear on her iPod? Does she honestly expect us to believe that she doesn't know how it got on there? Since iPods do not have the Zune function of being able to "squirt" a song to someone else, we can only assume that tiny-dog herself added that song to her iPod.
These posts inspired me to give the shuffle function on my iPod a shot. Without any explanations -- or excuses -- here is what die maschine pulled out of 9,562 possibilities:
1) Harry Belafonte “Sweetheart From Venezuela”
2) Siouxsie & The Banshees “Carousel”
3) Rykarda Parasol “Lonesome Place”
4) Willie Bobo “No Matter What Shape (Your Stomach’s In)”
5) PJ Harvey “My Beautiful Leah”
6) Röyksopp “So Easy”
7) Adam and the Ants “Omelette From Outer Space”
8) The Cure “Catch”
9) A-Politiq; “She Watch Channel Zero?!”
10) Eartha Kitt “Thursday’s Child”
Eh, tiny-dog, your list was more impressive!
Mathew, good list. Definitely haven't heard of some of that stuff.
Nup, you're just bitter cause I called out that you are an iPhone fanboy.
In the spirit of the times, here are the first 10 that came up on my iriver clix:
When I Fall - Steve Earle
Where Does the Good Go - Tegan & Sara
16 Days - whiskeytown
Ageless Beauty - Stars
Almost Ready - Dinosaur Jr.
Angeles - Elliott Smith
The Battle of Evermore - Led Zeppelin
Belong - REM
Black Thumbnail - Kings of Leon
Blue Monday - Flunk
The Director's cut (first 13) random shuffle from my iPod ...
1) Fiona Apple, "A Mistake"
2) Feist, "Honey Honey"
3) Colin Hay, "Waiting for My Real Life to Begin"
4) The Presidents of the United States, "Lump"
(...the live acoustic hippy-dippy version)
5) Spin Doctors, "Have You Ever Seen the Rain?"
6) Sinead O'Connor, "Mandinka"
7) Simon & Garfunkel, "The Only Living Boy in New York"
8) Popstar Assassins, "Why I'm Holding Out"
9) Underworld, "Thrash"
10) The Beatles, "Get Back"
11) Culture Club, "Church of the Poison Mind"
12)Stevie Nicks, "Nightbird"
13)Burl Ives, "A Holly, Jolly Christmas"
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