Check your childhood innocence at the door before venturing into this dark, perverted twist on a beloved and wholesome classic, updated for the morally questionable modern era by a very sick man, otherwise known as my brother.

First published in Uberhoot (a print precursor to tiny dog) in the late 1990s, it remains until today debatably the most controversial peice of Uberhoot's five and a half issue run. Of "Charlie Brown Christmas in the 90's," my father had only this to say: "Don't show your mother."