This is what we call bionic content, hastily tossed onto the site with nary a glance in the rear view mirror, in honor of the 50,000 word noveling marathon that is nanowrimo, in progress as we speak. I also have an obligation to the post-election masses to move on to a new tiny dog topic other than my disgust with the Bush theocracy, and thus I bring you Top 5 Melodramatic Masterpieces, as in songs, on ipod. In other words, songs of immortal greatness, that I have listened to over and over these long years, until my ears screamed for mercy.

Peter Gabriel: Blood of Eden

Soaring psychodrama of trashed romance, replete with religious imagery, weapons, despondency, and semi-orgasmic howling. Peter Gabriel must have had lots of therapy after a really traumatic marriage, is my guess. Ultimate song of serious, depressed, wine-fueled and trash-hearted mood, in which you are taking yourself dead seriously. Which happens to tiny dog more often than she is willing to admit.

Dire Straits: Tunnel of Love

Bruce Springsteen wishes this was his song. He stays up at night gnashing his teeth over his post 9/11 hackery, dreaming of the carnival ride imagery and the easy, tossed off heart-rending nostalgia of this song. Eat your heart out Bruuuce.

Replacements: Answering Machine

This is the greatest rock song I have ever heard. Bring on the raspy screaming and desperation. Bring on the spangly sounding, shreddy guitars. Bring on the naked emotions and the brilliant lines that reach out and smack you in the middle of the song. F****** great.

U2: Ultraviolet

I have listened to this song 56,309 times in my life by my estimate. And every time it feels like someone just pushed me off a cliff, roped to a burning hang glider of personal melodrama and thwarted emotional excess. Ok, what? What does that mean exactly? I really don't know! But I keep coming back.

Jeff Buckley: Last Goodbye

Jeff Buckley is my secret, doe-eyed music genius boyfriend in the afterworld, well, aside from Elliott Smith. I know, take a number, Jeff has no shortage of moping she-adherents who eagerly await death if only to mob his limo in the afterworld. I am so in love with this song, and that love has ruined me for any other, thus I will die alone. Oh wait, I am married. Whatever. Did I mention the way he sings like 1,000 angels doused in ether?

Well people, there you have it. The greatest hits of my most sullen and heart-rended moments of drama, splattered across the internet for all to mock.

Wait! As I was lying in bed lastnight I realized that I left off this most important of songs, bringing the list to six:

The Waterboys: Fisherman's Blues

Oh so sad, so sad. Song of funereal remorse about fleeting and bittersweet nature of life, replete with soaring, whisky-tainted Irish violin solo that makes you want to drink yourself to death in a pile of old photographs.

Hey, peeps. Send mail to mail@tiny-dog.com.