My favorite Christmas present this year (credit to my brother) is the ipod sock, a surprisingly controversial accessory for everyone's favorite digital music player. Many a panty-bunched Apple nerd seems knocked off his moorings by this item, however, I find it oddly compelling. The concept is this: you have a fruit-colored sock. You put your ipod in it. Then your ipod is as cute as your grandma's pomeranian in a hand knit sweater. This makes the manly male panty bunched apple nerds a little nervous I guess, but relax little buddies. I won't tell anyone that you ran out and bought some.

"Totally awesome headline"

It's 7:30 am, and I'm sitting here cleaning off the front page of tiny-dog, trying to think of something to put in its place. There isn't much, mentally, for me to draw from at the moment, though. Rooting through my brain pan, I come up only with the following dregs:

• I hate Christmas. This subject has been covered on tiny dog before as you may be aware, but I am just checking in to mention that I still hate it. It is everything that is wrong with America, such as Christian hypocrisy, corporate omnipresence, and mindless consumerism, all condensed down to one gooey confection. Not to mention office Christmas parties. Oh lord, English has no word for what I think of those.

• Ever been to Iceland? I am thinking about going there. I mean, you know you've never been there. Am I wrong? Aren't you just the least bit curious? The only problem is it looks like the main forms of recreation include outdoorsy crap and I'm kind of an indoor type of gal. Plus I hate snow. Ok, forget it then.

• Blogs suck, including this one, although this is not a blog, technically, since it pre-dated blogs and doesn't use blog software (which imparts an ugly, blue-printed sameness to the incoherent ramblings of millions online). Who cares what random people think, including me? Why does every random idiot off the street have to become his own magazine? I am taking tiny dog offline immediately based on these realizations. No, I'm serious. Hang on, I'm pulling it down as we speak.

• That was a lie, because that would require too much effort. Tiny dog, at this point, is an unstoppable locomotive of pointless rambling, with stripped brakes. I am powerless to stop it.

• Here is a really scary web site. Hey, I know... let's start a movement where we are theoretically against abortion, but in which we also deny sexually active people information about how to prevent pregnancy, and use US tax dollars to misinform them and try to morally shame them from educating themselves about their own bodies using creepy, sexist language about purity and gallantry. Another sage idea legislated on your behalf by the Christian right. Thanks Bush voters!

Hey, peeps. Send mail to mail@tiny-dog.com.