Lemon Pie | 1, 2, 3, 4, 5

The first few bites were like a blur, I'm sure you've all had Lemon Pie so you know what I mean. Eating the crust, setting up for that first solid bite of lemony custard. My mouth fairly waters just thinking about it. After that initial indulgence, I began to slow down in order to savor what is absolutely my mostest, favoritest dessert. As I gazed upon the half-eaten object of my desire what I saw made the hair on the back of my neck prickle, I felt a slight, sudden chill. Imbedded in the custard of my Lemon Pie, and heretofore covered by a sugary, flaky crust I noticed several tiny, fluorescent lime green spots occupying the space normally reserved only for yellow, lemony goodness. Bad Lemon Pie!?!

The noon break was over soon after I reluctantly tossed that half Lemon Pie into the trash. I was more embarrassed than worried. I guessed that Lemon Pie was waiting there under the saw for far longer than I originally thought. All the time singing its Sweet Sirens' song and tempting this sailor to run aground upon her deadly, forbidden, rocky shore.

I worked through the rest of the day without giving it too much more thought and followed my normal pattern after I got home, adding a few more cocktails, "because it was Friday." Patti came home and more cocktails were added to my volatile mix, along with another fattie or two. Life was indeed good, on the outside...

On the inside, however, forces beyond my control had been fomenting in the hours since I ingested that "Trojan Horse," that Lemon Pie...

It was about eight o'clock that night before we were ready to go out to dinner. We had been sitting around the computer, drinking and chatting, just enjoying being able to spend time together. I didn't even make mention to Patti about that Lemon Pie, by then it was just a fuzzy shape in the rear view mirror of my consciousness and I was keen on what was in front of me. Besides, like I said before, it was an embarrassing subject, best not even bring it up.

Next page | "Here Lies Dave, he survived the 60's, beat cocaine, brought down by...Lemon Pie!"
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